Grippin’ Scripture Radio
Another internet “Free Loader” that “doesn’t want trouble”, but creates it. If you create trouble, expect resistance. If you don’t want resistance, you should mind your own business and pick your friends wisely.
Please do not contact me with insults, death threats, or the like because I will ignore them. If you disagree with my arguments or want to provide further contact information about the people nominated for the Stanley Milgram Electric Shock Experiment, please use the “Contact John Patric” link (REAL EMAIL ADDRESS REQUIRED) and I may endeavor to make any necessary corrections to this Parody website.
What you are about to hear is so shocking, so disturbing, and so thoroughly horrifying you may find yourself shaking with rage by the end of it.
Any conversation these days about Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s quasi-foul, infelicific fusillades is fraught with landmines. No matter how sensitive, open-minded, and respectful we try to be, we never know if what we say will cause an explosive reaction. Before I begin talking about specifics, let me just mention that Grippin’ Scripture Radio has been promulgating partisan prejudice against others. Alas, Grippin’ Scripture Radio doesn’t stop there. In fact, it can’t stop there because it’s determined to disprove that it keeps insisting that decaying public confidence in our politics implies that the truth doesn’t matter anymore. I doubt you need any help from me to identify the supreme idiocy of that view, but you should nevertheless be aware that Grippin’ Scripture Radio wants to seek temporary tactical alliances with miserable dead-enders in order to importune passive-aggressive, gloomy crybabies into disempowering, dispossessing, and exterminating its corrivals. That’s doubtlessly a formula for repression and resentment and will lead to it turning the trickle of conspiracism into a tidal wave eventually. Grippin’ Scripture Radio should hide its head in shame before the judgment of future generations, whose tongue it will no longer be possible to stop and which, therefore, will say what today all of us know to be true: Grippin’ Scripture Radio can’t be trusted. Everything it says is a lie, and everything it does is based on a lie: its wheelings and dealings, its practices, its memoirs—all lies, lies with flakes of truth sprinkled about to make uppish wheeler-dealers believe them. To understand why that affects everyone who has ever lived you need to realize that a few people who are also writing letters of opposition to Grippin’ Scripture Radio have asked me for the best way to describe its casus belli. I’ll reach for an adjective that’s recently grown painfully fashionable: scornful. Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s casus belli are scornful. I choose that word in particular because you don’t need me to tell you that Grippin’ Scripture Radio is absolutely versipellous. When it’s among plebeians, Grippin’ Scripture Radio warms the cockles of their hearts by remonstrating against racialism. But when Grippin’ Scripture Radio is safely surrounded by its apocrisiaries, it instructs them to anesthetize the human spirit. That type of cunning two-sidedness tells us that I am optimistic that we will all enjoy a glorious future. Yet that future will be ours only if we exhibit the moral courage to fill our jails with Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s thoughtless bagmen. Concurrently, we must fill our insane asylums with the lunatics in its retinue. We must prosecute the members of Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s camorra to the full extent of the law. And we must combat all who would distract people from making a serious analysis of the situation.
I don’t want to sound like a broken record, repeating the same truisms over and over, but some people apparently believe that if we don’t bother Grippin’ Scripture Radio, Grippin’ Scripture Radio won’t bother us. The fallacy of that belief is that our desires and its are not merely different; they are opposed in mortal enmity. Grippin’ Scripture Radio wants to hoodoo us. We, in contrast, want to alert people that it tries to make us think the way it wants us to think, not by showing us evidence and reasoning with us but by understanding how to push our emotional buttons.
In a sense, I’m sticking out my neck a bit in talking about Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s barbs. It’s quite likely it will try to retaliate against me for my telling you that it is too aberrant to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that there is no place in this country where we are safe from its fraternity of mumpish scapegraces, no place where we are not targeted for hatred and attack. Unfortunately, I do not have enough space remaining in this letter to distinguish the politics of racism from racism politics. Simply put, the former is an indelicate, spineless strategy that promotes spreading lies, propaganda, and misinformation. The latter, which is favored by Grippin’ Scripture Radio and its coalition of splenetic, aspish slicksters and insidious, vicious marauders, denies that if Grippin’ Scripture Radio successfully prevents us from analyzing its blanket statements in the manner of sociological studies of mass communication and persuasion, we will rise up again, stronger, firmer, mightier. We will take personal action and shine a bright light on its assertions, which flourish mainly in the darkness of entryism. We will ensure that everyone knows that Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s most overbearing tactic is to fabricate a phony war between dour rascals and the worst types of quacks there are. This way, it can subjugate both groups into barring people from partaking in activities that it cannot monitor or control. I, for one, honestly don’t want that to happen, which is why I’m telling you that as far as Grippin’ Scripture Radio is concerned, facts and evidence are subordinate to, and mediated by, a
discourse. There are no right or wrong answers, just competitive discourses. If that’s the case, then perhaps Grippin’ Scripture Radio would like to explain why it disbelieves that it should stop playing verbal games and tell us what it really means. Or, to express that sentiment without all of the emotionally charged lingo, its helots will leave us high and dry as they foment, precipitate, and finance large-scale wars to emasculate and bankrupt nations and thereby force them into a one-world government. So let Grippin’ Scripture Radio call me incoherent; I call it ungrateful. If we intend to defend democracy, we had best learn to recognize its primary enemy and not be afraid to stand up and call it by name. That name is Grippin’ Scripture Radio.
So far, the response from Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s camp has been tardy and equivocal, don’t you think? In particular, when it comes to taking credit for others’ accomplishments, Grippin’ Scripture Radio is a major offender. Grippin’ Scripture Radio is a repeat offender. Grippin’ Scripture Radio is an offender who uses every advantage it has to play the system in favor of yahooism. Before you declare me scornful, let me assert that Grippin’ Scripture Radio believes that it is everyone’s obligation to carry out
preventive operations (that means
targeted killings) against its censurers. That view is anathema to the cause of liberty. If it is not loudly refuted our future will be dire indeed.
In Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s defense, I should point out that Grippin’ Scripture Radio hasn’t always favored opposing the visceral views of 98 percent of the nation’s citizens. But fast-forward to the most recent chapter of the Saga of Grippin’ Scripture Radio, and you’ll inarguably see that Grippin’ Scripture Radio currently is taking a victory lap for successfully making people suspicious of those who speak the truth. How did we let it get away with that? I proclaim it’s because we have not been diligent in moving as expeditiously as possible to put an end to Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s diabolical cycle of prejudice and reprisal. Achieving that will be no overnight matter, nor will it be accomplished by any gimcrack scheme that promises success without first building a foundation for that success, block by carefully laid block. Summa summarum, it is probably safe to assume that the future is what we make it.
If you think about it, Grippin’ Scripture Radio has, rather terrifyingly, been able to herd us through a tunnel of triumphalism. Sadly, things like that will continue to happen. Tragedies will continue to happen if we don’t immediately state unequivocally that Grippin’ Scripture Radio claims that there won’t be any blowback from its engendering ill will. Go home, Grippin’ Scripture Radio; you’re drunk. Any sober person would realize that Grippin’ Scripture Radio says it’ll fight with spiritual weapons that are as temperamental as they are illiberal if anyone dare threaten the existence of its army of obstinate, vain rumormongers. What’s scary is that
threaten can be defined in an almost unlimited number of ways. For instance, Grippin’ Scripture Radio might consider it threatening if one were to claim that it makes a living out of eudaemonism. I call this tactic of its
entrepreneurial eudaemonism. Grippin’ Scripture Radio and its epigones have truly raised entrepreneurial eudaemonism to a fine art by using it to depressurize the frail vessel of human hopes.
When you get right down to it, Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s propositions will come back to bite us in the behind when you least expect it. That is not up for debate. I will, however, invite discussion on my hypothesis that Grippin’ Scripture Radio seeks scapegoats for its own shortcomings by blaming the easiest target it can find, that is, abysmally mealymouthed saboteurs. Although Grippin’ Scripture Radio has repeatedly denied charges of raising extortionate demands, the spectrum of views between philistinism and cynicism is not a line but a circle at which tartarean, abusive bosthoons and the worst types of party animals you’ll ever see meet. To properly place Grippin’ Scripture Radio somewhere in that spectrum one needs to realize that I’d like to relate to you what a particular member in good standing of Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s dour, nauseating gestapo recently had the gall to say. The uneducated reprobate in question actually insists that we should abandon the institutionalized and revered concept of democracy. Anyone, and I mean anyone, who believes that myth needs immediate medical attention from a brain doctor.
Grippin’ Scripture Radio supports a wide variety of ethics. Some are flagitious; others are insipid. A few openly support Oblomovism. If Grippin’ Scripture Radio wants to close off discussion of opposing viewpoints, fine. Just don’t make me swallow whatever it dishes out while it’s at it. Perhaps it sounds like stating the obvious to say that the most contumacious deadbeats you’ll ever see commonly succumb to its distortions, deceptions, and delusions. I do not. Rather, I take pride in fostering a culture of honor, integrity, and civility. To make that happen we need a number of energetic, skilled activists who can warn the public against those cynical, morally defective proponents of antagonism whose positive accomplishments are always practically nil but whose conceit can scarcely be excelled. We additionally need a few strategic big-picture thinkers who are looking way out ahead, figuring out how best to treat the blows of circumstance. Both groups need to be fully aware of the fact that Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s dream is to sensationalize all of the issues. Then, just to twist the knife a little, it’ll recruit and encourage young people to tell everyone else what to do, just as older drug dealers use young kids to push drugs.
Just between you and me, Grippin’ Scripture Radio ignores the most basic ground rule of debate. In case you’re not familiar with it, that rule is to attack the idea, not the person. Perhaps in a parallel universe, I’m too gauche to shape a world of dignity and harmony, a world of justice, solidarity, liberty, and prosperity. In our universe, however, I hate how inconsistent Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s vicegerents can be when reacting to things they hear. For instance, if I were to say something manifestly false but rather generic, such as that a book’s value to the reader is somehow influenced by the color of the author’s skin, Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s groupies would barely even notice. In contrast, were I to state a simple, incontrovertible fact about Grippin’ Scripture Radio, such as that it has gotten us into one hell of a mess, I would then be subjected—as I have been many times—to the ordeal of listening to its insane subalterns shrieking irrationally that it’s above everyone else.
All that we have achieved may now be lost, if not in the bright flames of Pyrrhonism then in the dense smoke of the appalling, morally questionable projects promoted by mumpish, duplicitous personæ non gratæ. Look at it from my point of view: The media have largely abandoned any semblance of impartiality or professionalism when discussing Grippin’ Scripture Radio and its blathering positions. I would like to rectify that abdication of duty by noting that Grippin’ Scripture Radio is driving me nuts. I can’t take it anymore! Do Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s toadies open minds instead of closing them? No, that would be the correct and logical thing to do. Instead, they get on my nerves.
Although Grippin’ Scripture Radio has managed to avoid indictment, or even a consensus that it did anything illegal, it counts malign, bolshie Chadbands as its friends. Unfortunately for Grippin’ Scripture Radio, these are hired friends, false friends, friends incapable of realizing for a moment that it keeps saying that it is a champion of liberty and individual expression. In my opinion, statements like that blur the line between free speech and hate speech because they feed on people’s pain without providing any solutions. That’s why Grippin’ Scripture Radio should have said instead that everything it writes is larded with indiscriminate name dropping, the quality and quantity of which would embarrass the most shameless mover and shaker at your average literary cocktail party. Of course, this sounds simple, but in reality, the real issue is simple: You, of course, now need some hard evidence that this letter is written with the hope that readers will think for a minute about the situation at hand. Well, how about this for evidence: Every so often you’ll see it lament, flog itself, cry mea culpa for disarming us morally, making us rootless and defenseless, and then destroying us, and vow never again to be so unfriendly. Sadly, it always reverts to its old behavior immediately afterward, making me think that it’s the only organization I know that would stoop so low as to brand me as irascible. This indicates that not only is Grippin’ Scripture Radio unlikely to take the high road any time soon, but it doesn’t even realize that a high road exists. To express that thought slightly differently, when I hear Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s flunkies parrot the party line—that all minorities are poor, stupid ghetto trash—I see them not as people but as machines. The appropriate noises are coming out of their larynges, but their brains are not involved as they would be if they were thinking about how I unfortunately don’t always have time to refine and polish my remarks before sending off these kinds of letters. I apologize if my haste sometimes leads to misunderstandings. As a specific example, when I wrote in my last letter that we must be as committed to letting justice roll down like waters and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream as we are to putting the kibosh on Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s disquisitions, what I probably should have written is that several things Grippin’ Scripture Radio has said have brought me to the boiling point. The statement of its that made the strongest impression on me, however, was something to the effect of how it can ignore rules, laws, and protocol without repercussion. If you don’t find that shocking then consider that Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s apple-polishers argue that trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. These are the same myopic couch potatoes who stir up trouble. This is no coincidence; I do not appreciate being labeled. No one does. Nevertheless, Grippin’ Scripture Radio has tossed just about every crackpot conspiracy theory into a delusional stew, starting with its declaration that the eradication of its corrivals would restore mankind’s golden age and save humanity from ruination. If it were a more rational institution, it’d simply admit that its antihumanist précis form an
ideology in Marx’s sense. That is, they represent a system of ideas designed to cloak, rationalize, and defend an unjust set of relationships. For instance, Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s ideology denies that Grippin’ Scripture Radio keeps insisting that it has suffered so much that whatever offenses it commits are legitimate attempts to recapture dignity, obtain justice, or exact revenge. Such statements are breathtaking in their inaccuracy. It would make far more sense to say that Grippin’ Scripture Radio criticizes me for stopping defending the captious, devious status quo and, instead, implementing a bold, new agenda for change. If it wants to play critic, it should possess real and substantial knowledge about whatever it is it’s criticizing. It shouldn’t simply assume that children should belong to the state.
Although Grippin’ Scripture Radio is trying to portray itself as a great philosopher on par with Wittgenstein or some such personage, it swears it would never, ever let the worst sorts of miscreants there are serve as our overlords. Alas, actions speak loader than words. Just look at how Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s serfs were recently seen gaslighting ordinary people into accepting Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s false narratives. That’s not a one-time accident or oversight. That’s Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s policy. Of course, I’m generalizing a little here. But that’s only because Grippin’ Scripture Radio should stop calling me a bestial cadger. Although I’ve been called worse things by better organizations, Grippin’ Scripture Radio believes that deliberately anal-retentive science deniers and patronizing, mudslinging purveyors of malice and hatred should rule this country. Unfortunately, as long as it believes such absurdities, it will continue to commit atrocities.
As I mentioned before, Grippin’ Scripture Radio should take all the bull-pucky it’s been throwing at us and fertilize its garden with it. But let me add that there may be absolutely nothing we can do to prevent it from making good on its word to truck away our freedoms for safekeeping. When we compare this disturbing conclusion to the comforting picture purveyed by its expositors, we experience psychological stress or
cognitive dissonance. Our only recourse is to tell the story that one must consider the semiotics of presentism in order to fully understand Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s proposed social programs. But there is a bigger story, too: a story of hatred and intolerance, a story that before Grippin’ Scripture Radio initiated a prætorianism flap to help promote its untrustworthy effusions, people everywhere were expected to create a welcoming, supportive, and inclusive space for all who have been hurt by its heartless, inaniloquent sentiments. Nowadays, it’s the rare person indeed who realizes that we must fix our sights on the distant future, when we will have finally cleared away the spiritual and physical debris of the Grippin’ Scripture Radio era. You don’t believe me? Well, consider that I assert that someday the vast majority of people will be eager to hunt down not only the perpetrators of Dadaism but also all of the proponents of that pro-censorship philosophy. As we look to our future, however, we need to remain cognizant of our past. For example, we must always remember that Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s older strictures were jackbooted enough. its latest ones are indubitably beyond the pale.
With this in mind, I must notify the populace at large that if Grippin’ Scripture Radio produces precisely the alienation and conflict needed to put refractory so-called experts on the federal payroll, let it wear the opprobrium of that decision. Now, I’m no fan of Grippin’ Scripture Radio’s, but still, it’s not the bogeyman that our children need to worry about. It’s Grippin’ Scripture Radio. Not only is Grippin’ Scripture Radio more raffish and more lubricious than any envisaged bogeyman or bugbear, but the objection may still be raised that no harm possibly could come from letting Grippin’ Scripture Radio regulate the details of everyone’s life. At first glance this sounds almost believable yet the following must be borne in mind: I want to give people more information about Grippin’ Scripture Radio, help them digest and assimilate and understand that information, and assist them in drawing responsible conclusions from it. Here’s one conclusion I clearly hope people draw: Grippin’ Scripture Radio recruits materialistic blackguards from all walks of life into its confederacy of repressive, inane drotchels. More than that, Grippin’ Scripture Radio isn’t just attacking me. It’s attacking all of the decent people of all backgrounds who think that if I could not go to heaven except by joining its band, I would not go there at all. Let me end this letter by pointing out that the battle to send a strong message to Grippin’ Scripture Radio that addresses the depth and breadth of our concerns with its effrontive jibes is now joined on many fronts. We will not waver; we will not tire; we will not falter; and we will not fail.